Tundras live: Dumb Dad Jokes, Incorrect Opinions, Relationship Advice, and grammar lessons

Ok...I can't argue that logic.

 

You don’t need those in Wisconsin in October

 

You wanna be the bartender?

I like this plan, money is good. We're gonna need it. I have expensive firearm taste.

 

Lemme tell you how often I had to keep my 30 pack of Busch light in a cooler….

Spoiler

Never. It was never.

 

I'll bring the rice. Only $22 at BJs.

 

That's a great start.

 

Seriously? Not something more manly like a SW 29? Nothing says I love you man like a dirty Harry.

https://youtu.be/8Xjr2hnOHiM?si=LwFZozyTUfKIobTC

 

Win-win-win.

 

Y'all have a Good night ..

@LarryDangerfield , congrats on getting engaged..

 

Ooh, my area of expertise (the immigration bit not the ladyboy bit). The minimum time for naturalization is after having a Green Card for 3 years and maintained proper residence - that's only for those who married their way here, everyone else has to wait 5 years. It took 15 months for me to be approved for the visa/Green Card and that's only cos I come from a country full of white people, I'm sure that if the bods at Immigration suspected that my 'suntan' was permanent all year round they might have dragged their feet a bit longer.

If the Green Card wasn't the first clue to US fuckwittery I don't know what would be! It's been anything but green for a long time now.

And even when they've got their Green Card it's not overly easy to keep if you get rid of your sponsor - who, it should be noted is still on the hook for any benefits said immigrant may claim, even after they've been ditched, probably something to watch out for if you're after a hump and dump...

 

There you go @LarryDangerfield. Getting cheaper by the minute. Maybe you can trade your rice for potatoes.

 

In retrospect, it's probably a bloody good thing I did end up in the States. I was looking to move to Bulgaria just before I met my wife and would have been more than happy in my favorite Bulgarian bar, keeping pace with the Russians, those fuckers know how to knock back Vodka! Good because I suppose my old vodka buddies have probably had to leave the country by now...

 

Probably best to forget the rice and just go for an Eastern European, those Slavic girls are firecrackers.

 

Why do think I said potatoes?

 

Aah, I thought you meant that rice was just for cheapskates.

 

Rice is the staple of Asian an Hispanic cuisine. Potatoes is eastern European...pierogies and Vodka. I assume (as a dumb american) that Euro girls are higher cost.

 

One would have thought so but I've not noticed Thai brides being shy with the wallet in the malls.

 

It's my Friday night!
Time to throw on some Nirvana and hit the gym, you in? @GODZILLA

 

Same.

I hate nirvana and I'm fat. Phuck you, Zach.

 

You can fuck off back to England with that "The US is racist" bullshit.

 

You can be honest with us, this is a safe space.

 

I am deeply disappointed I can only thank this post a single time.

 

Bottom line Someone's gotta be the %$%ch!!!!

 

Eh... it's just a knee

not like the dude got Theissman'd