Tundras live: Agree to disagree (a lesson in civility)

Good luck. That’s probably a lot like the first day in a new country when I travel. Or the first day back home. Just gotta drag your azz thru it.

 

I'll join ya Friday night buddy.

 

It's not going back to work so much as not being in the right headspace for work right now. If it weren't such short notice and my department wasn't in shambles I'd have taken the week off after yesterday. Things being what they are, that's not really an option. I'll muddle through, but I kinda worry I'm going to mess something up with the lack of sleep and poor mental state. Worst case I eff up really big and get my ass chewed. I think losing the people recently made them keenly aware how much of a skeleton crew we are working with.

 

I feel ya. I’m not going thru what you are but every meeting/interaction I had today was a dumpster fire. People not liking my answer, so they go over/around me only to find out I was right. It’s draining and with no end in sight. Very hard to rally in that kind of environment.

 

But phuk it. My truck still runs like a champ, I’m home with the fam and the wife made me a martini. Life is good (enough)

 

Yeah, I'm not a fan of people. At least when they go over/around they are getting the same answer. Sucks to have people undermine you in an attempt to people please. Had that at one job, and I would up refusing to deal with the issues. Just referred them straight above me to start with. Boss didn't like that, but didn't have anything to say when I said "you're gonna give them what they want anyway. Why do I have to look like an asshole/idiot telling them no first?"

Sounds like the important parts of life are good, and that's what counts!

 

I had an epiphany in the shower this morning. I can take every other Monday off and still accrue PTO. l know that feeling, but I only have 1.5 years to go. Trying to balance the fuck it attitude with the work ethic that got me here. The attitude is winning. But if you're right, you're right. Someone will recognize that. Keep pushing the limits.

 

I'd be tempted to do that if I were on a regular M-F schedule. I really don't feel like 2 days off is enough to recover from work crap sometimes.

 

The last picture I took of Stella. She had a seizure a few hours before this, but had fully recovered. A few hours after this she had the worst seizure, and I honestly wasnt sure she was going to start breathing again. This was the last good moment up until she came back around to say goodbye less than 24 hours after this picture.



I miss my friend.

 

Sweet girl

Shitty deal but props for doing the right thing.

 

Yeah, it's part of the deal. I just didn't expect it so soon. I thought I had a few more years, because she was totally okay for the last few years. She slowed down a bit, but she never had any major issues. She had a few really minor seizures, like 10 seconds if that, and they weren't violent ones. She's just stiffen up and then let out a couple screams after because she was afraid. This was so fast, though. Sunday I figured I had years, Monday she had the first major fit, and Tuesday she went where I cannot follow. I'm so glad she doesn't have to go through that anymore, but for the last 13 years if I was down she was my little buddy cheering me up.

Sorry. I don't mean to wallow, but sitting in a bunker alone for work and I'm just... processing? Yeah, let's go with processing. It sounds better than wallowing.


I appreciate all of you guys being here. It makes me feel less alone. Thank you.

 

Don't be afraid to mourn because some people say its just a dog. We all process things differently. I always privately cry like a little girl when I lose one of my best buds, and not ashamed of that.

 

We're here man.
Processing.. sounds great!

 

Definitely not ashamed to say it wrecks me, though I generally try to keep it together around people. Anyone that wants to try and say "it's just a dog" can fuck off to fuckoffistan with that bullshit. If you don't love a dog enough that it hurts like hell to lose them, then you don't deserve a dog. Hell, none of us deserve dogs, but they're always there for us and happy to get belly rubs!

 

A little over an hour left on the shift. I'm actually pretty exhausted at this point, so I hope I can just sleep for a solid 10 hours once home. My eyes feel like they've been rubbed with sandpaper.

 

Hit 140K on the way to work this morning.

 

Low miles and a clean dash!

 

@RainMan_PNW should pass you up in precisely 2.2 years.

 

True. Not bad for not cleaning the inside for about 3 months though. 95% of the time I’m the only one in it which helps.

 

NOOOOO! Never used canned air on the dash. You'll blow the dust behind the "glass" through the edges and the odometer peg. Damp towel. Never canned air.

 

You'll have to forgive him, he's used to the Tesla big screen TV.

 

The problem is blowing the dust around at all can push it through any gaps. Damp cloth, drying cloth.