Funny inappropriate family funnies

ColoradoTJ · Dec 14, 2016

What are your family funny totally inappropriate things that have happened?

I'll start.

We have a racially mixed family on the wife's side. So we are usually Joking "off the cuff" at each other. One Christmas, the one sister that is married to a black man was asked if she wanted some Turkey. She said yes. She was then asked if she wanted white or dark meat. Whiteout even thinking, she blurts out "mom, you know I always have like dark meat." As you can imagine, her husband says "you really don't have to state the obvious love."
I'm surprised half of us didn't die from laughter or choking on a piece of turkey.

Another one: There are only two boys in the whole family of children out of nine. The two boys have been best friends since they even knew they could be friends. One white, one mixed.
One afternoon we were having a party, lots of different ethnic groups at the house, kids all playing in the yard.
The boys were really into power rangers. Well, as you have probably guessed, one of the boys started yelling out "white power, white power..."
Of course this got a lot of attention, and one of us yells out "Jesus man, what are you teaching your kids at home?" We all laughed so hard, and the kids were oblivious to all this. They took off their power ranger suits and the night was one of the best.

14tundra · Dec 14, 2016

A buddy of mine said this happened to his brother in law. Not sure if its true but its funny non the less.

So he goes to family Christmas of his new girl friend. First time meeting the parents and extended family. He was home from college and not really sure what to expect. So they go in and do the awkward half hug/handshakes and things seem to be going well when it hits him...he has to shit!-like not a "I can hold it or I'll be fine" like a "I have to shit NOW!" kinda shit!!! Panicked, he goes back thru the house and decides to go upstairs to hide the crime scene and inevitable smell. locks the second story bathroom door and BOOM! unloads death! half sweating and nervous he looks over and YEP, NO toilet paper...He panics and starts to look in the cabinets and drawers. no luck....He thinks for a minute on how to survive this. comes up with idea to use his sock. but then abandons the plan in fear of the "take your shoes off and stay awhile" from her dad. He didn't want to explain why he was only wearing one sock! well, time is a factor and what was minutes seemed like days. with no other option he used his sock! Now it was decision time. Do I flush said sock and hope it doesn't clog the toilet? or try and hid it in the trash can and hope they don't see it? He gets a brilliant idea, I'll open the window and throw it out! keep my shoes on and take my chances! Time was running out! He took the sock and flung it out the second story window! washed up and returned down stairs, dodging a bullet or so he thought!

It was time for dinner and the entire family gathered in the formal dining room and were all seated, when her dad opened the front door and called in the family dog!!! in comes a black lab with a shit sock in its mouth at 100 miles per hour! He sank in his chair as the mom said, "Drop it" and held the shit sock in one hand and glass of wine in the other. all hell breaks loose! smell, sock and Christmas all in one uncomfortable room! I don't think they dated much longer after that... the guilt was too much for him....

joonbug · Dec 14, 2016

14tundra said: ↑

A buddy of mine said this happened to his brother in law. Not sure if its true but its funny non the less.

So he goes to family Christmas of his new girl friend. First time meeting the parents and extended family. He was home from college and not really sure what to expect. So they go in and do the awkward half hug/handshakes and things seem to be going well when it hits him...he has to shit!-like not a "I can hold it or I'll be fine" like a "I have to shit NOW!" kinda shit!!! Panicked, he goes back thru the house and decides to go upstairs to hide the crime scene and inevitable smell. locks the second story bathroom door and BOOM! unloads death! half sweating and nervous he looks over and YEP, NO toilet paper...He panics and starts to look in the cabinets and drawers. no luck....He thinks for a minute on how to survive this. comes up with idea to use his sock. but then abandons the plan in fear of the "take your shoes off and stay awhile" from her dad. He didn't want to explain why he was only wearing one sock! well, time is a factor and what was minutes seemed like days. with no other option he used his sock! Now it was decision time. Do I flush said sock and hope it doesn't clog the toilet? or try and hid it in the trash can and hope they don't see it? He gets a brilliant idea, I'll open the window and throw it out! keep my shoes on and take my chances! Time was running out! He took the sock and flung it out the second story window! washed up and returned down stairs, dodging a bullet or so he thought!

It was time for dinner and the entire family gathered in the formal dining room and were all seated, when her dad opened the front door and called in the family dog!!! in comes a black lab with a shit sock in its mouth at 100 miles per hour! He sank in his chair as the mom said, "Drop it" and held the shit sock in one hand and glass of wine in the other. all hell breaks loose! smell, sock and Christmas all in one uncomfortable room! I don't think they dated much longer after that... the guilt was too much for him....
Click to expand...

bobeast · Dec 14, 2016

I think I might have texted the GF to bring me some TP.

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Funny inappropriate family funnies

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ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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14tundra On Wisconsin!

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Funny inappropriate family funnies

#1 ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

#2 14tundra On Wisconsin!

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#4 bobeast really old member

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#1
ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

#2
14tundra On Wisconsin!

#3
joonbug °°°°°°°°°°

#4
bobeast really old member

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