1. Welcome to Tundras.com!

    You are currently viewing as a guest! To get full-access, you need to register for a FREE account.

    As a registered member, you’ll be able to:
    • Participate in all Tundra discussion topics
    • Transfer over your build thread from a different forum to this one
    • Communicate privately with other Tundra owners from around the world
    • Post your own photos in our Members Gallery
    • Access all special features of the site

Tundras live: Dumb Dad Jokes, Incorrect Opinions, and Relationship Advice.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by Bob, Jan 4, 2014.

  1. Jul 15, 2016 at 5:57 PM
    #3871
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    Not the worst afternoon.

     
  2. Jul 15, 2016 at 5:58 PM
    #3872
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
    Beautiful pic!
     
    jberry813[QUOTED] likes this.
  3. Jul 16, 2016 at 6:55 AM
    #3873
    TruckyTruck

    TruckyTruck Dumbest Username

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2014
    Member:
    #20
    Messages:
    3,616
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Gary
    Texas
    If you're going to have a dually... why not a van!
    IMG_20160716_085310.jpg
     
  4. Jul 16, 2016 at 1:47 PM
    #3874
    TXMiamiFan

    TXMiamiFan SSEM #3 and tractor extraordinaire

    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2015
    Member:
    #2160
    Messages:
    25,274
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jose
    Houston, TX
    Vehicle:
    2016 White Crew Max TRD
    TRD Pro Grille, ESP Storage, Tailgate Inserts, Line-X Bedliner, Weathertech Floorliners, Wet Okole Seat Covers, 5" Shorty Antenna, Mickey Thompson MM-366 Wheels, ToyTec Boss, 35" BFG KO2 to name a few.
  5. Jul 16, 2016 at 6:38 PM
    #3875
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
  6. Jul 18, 2016 at 12:50 PM
    #3876
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
    Rental for the work week

     
    TNTundra08 likes this.
  7. Jul 18, 2016 at 1:14 PM
    #3877
    mdavis

    mdavis I need a beer.

    Joined:
    Feb 13, 2015
    Member:
    #966
    Messages:
    3,342
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Michael
    Rock Hill, SC
    Give it hell! :burnrubber:
     
    T-Rex266[QUOTED] likes this.
  8. Jul 18, 2016 at 1:31 PM
    #3878
    Noodle

    Noodle That Guy

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2016
    Member:
    #3151
    Messages:
    881
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Chris
    Files creek
    Vehicle:
    2016 Tundra Limited TRD DC Inferno
    Beat it like a rented mule
     
    FirstGenTundra and zcarpenter92 like this.
  9. Jul 18, 2016 at 2:04 PM
    #3879
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    I remember my last Mustang convertible rental car:

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
     
  10. Jul 18, 2016 at 2:32 PM
    #3880
    Bob

    Bob [OP] Member Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2014
    Member:
    #1
    Messages:
    4,245
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Bob
    SoCal
    Vehicle:
    07 Tacoma PreRunner Black
    Story time?
     
    T-Rex266 likes this.
  11. Jul 18, 2016 at 2:35 PM
    #3881
    1G3-TRD

    1G3-TRD New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2014
    Member:
    #486
    Messages:
    508
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Aaron
    Vehicle:
    2014 double cab TRD off road
    That story always starts with..... see what had happened was
     
    mdavis likes this.
  12. Jul 18, 2016 at 2:39 PM
    #3882
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    Got in an early morning fight with a deer. He lost...but I almost did too.



    Swerved, smacked the fuck out of him (yard-sale of broken parts all over the road, blood and fur in the headlight). Bounced off the mountain wall twice on the passenger side and then the passenger front of the car head on into an outcropping of the mountain. That made the airbags blow...and ultimately when I knew I was fucked. When the airbags deflated, I was very confused as I was looking at the mountain. The car had spun 90 degrees and I was going backwards. Which meant spinning across 2 lanes of traffic...and then off a 31 foot cliff backwards. Oh and then I finally landed and stopped in the river.
     
  13. Jul 18, 2016 at 3:38 PM
    #3883
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
  14. Jul 18, 2016 at 3:59 PM
    #3884
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    The amusing part was I was making fun of Ford styling and ergonomics. They put a full fucking 10 key on the dash. When I first got in i was like.....w the f? Who the hell puts 10 extra buttons on a dash? Well fast forward to Bambi collision, boy was I happy with that 10 key! All my shit was scattered in the car and I had no idea where my phone was, but I did sync my phone and that 911 call was easy.

    I wished I had a recording of the 911 call too. Having been involved in more than one near death experience, I've learned that staying calm and explaining concrete details without fluff to a 911 operator proves the most useful. However with a story like mine...the 911 operator chick was like..."Are you serious?" And then she told me to stay in the car because I made the mistake of telling her I was bleeding from the head. I had to repeat the part where I just flew off the cliff and was IN A FUCKING RIVER and moved to the passenger side to try to stay dry as the water was coming in the cab while she was prolonging the call. Keep in mind I was 50 miles from the closest major city.

    911 chick: "Can anyone see you"
    Me: "No..I drove off a cliff. I'm literally under everyone driving by"
    911 chick: "Would a helicopter be able to see you?"
    Me: "Maybe, but I landed between two trees. I can only see some sky so I assume they would barely see me. I'm just gonna get out and climb up to road level"
    911 chick: "Wait for help to arrive."
    Me: "I'll take my chances. With my luck I'd die from hypothermia before anyone gets here"
    911 chick: "Sir please stay in the car"
    Me: "I'm in the fucking river. Water is coming inside the car. I'm hanging up and getting out. Thank you."


    Climbed across the hood of the car and hopped to the embankment. Climbed back up to road level. Dusted my knees and hands off and what do I see...white Ford Explorer with black steel wheels. "Oh I know you're a cop...or an asshole for buying that vehicle...please stop."
    Dude passes by...fuck!. Wait.....he's turning around and comes back towards me with a radio in hand! Turns out he was off duty Sheriff deputy on his way back to South Lake Tahoe. Had no idea about the incident and was just radioing in rode debris. He did initial trauma crap to me and stayed through the whole ordeal. First actual emergency responders didn't show up for almost 30 minutes. I was in the middle of nowhere.
     
  15. Jul 18, 2016 at 4:39 PM
    #3885
    Law323

    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2016
    Member:
    #3081
    Messages:
    9,812
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    Nice!! Got lucky right there!! I know how that feels. Flipped my first taco (99 model) in college. Fell asleep at the wheel heading home after pulling classes from 6 am to 7 pm. No seatbelt, woke up in midair thinking "dude the sky looks weird today" as soon as I hit the ground my "moustache" section slammed in my steering wheel. Woke up upside down (in the passenger seat no less) police, fire, and EMS had been there for a good while. Said the truck flipped about 3 times sideswiped another car and crashed into a tree broadside, they thought I was DOA. Taco was gone and almost halfway wrapped around a tree, had blood all over my face. Scared the shit out of a cop when he was kneeling down by the window i was near when I woke up screaming "WHAT THE FUCK???" Crawled out, dusted myself off. Felt my lip and said to the EMS "hey I think I got a busted lip" they were freaking out to say the least. After all that, brought me to the hospital, I'm just walking around asking how much the snickers were in the vending machine. Doc was shocked as told me 95% of people that get in wrecks like that have brain damage or dead and that's WITH seat belts. Told the doc "well, good thing I wasn't wearing my belt then huh?" For a week or two, I looked just like Underdog with that lip LOL
     
  16. Jul 18, 2016 at 4:53 PM
    #3886
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    Sometimes physics is just on your side! 3 CT scans later I only needed one staple in my head. The rest was just bumps and bruises. No brain damage (that I know of...derp duh wut). Although I did lose the ability to give a shit about other people's remedial problems.
     
  17. Jul 18, 2016 at 4:57 PM
    #3887
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
    Jberry's all like "hold-up dispatch, I found a Pokemon in the forest. Lemme get to that first, before I get to the road."
     
    FirstGenTundra, Ardnut, 2cID and 2 others like this.
  18. Jul 18, 2016 at 5:07 PM
    #3888
    Law323

    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2016
    Member:
    #3081
    Messages:
    9,812
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    Always had the inability to care about others remedial problems. I call that a genetic advantage LOL
    Come to think of it, might be why I ended up marrying a neuropsychologist, I must have latent brain damage because of that, or was I just born this way? Ah, remedial, can't give a crap. :itllbuffout:
     
    jberry813[QUOTED] likes this.
  19. Jul 18, 2016 at 5:08 PM
    #3889
    Law323

    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2016
    Member:
    #3081
    Messages:
    9,812
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    Was he playing POKE OH SHIT?
     
    T-Rex266[QUOTED] likes this.
  20. Jul 18, 2016 at 5:31 PM
    #3890
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    What the fuck is a Pokemon?
     
    FirstGenTundra and zcarpenter92 like this.
  21. Jul 18, 2016 at 5:35 PM
    #3891
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
    Not sure if srs.
     
    zcarpenter92 likes this.
  22. Jul 18, 2016 at 7:37 PM
    #3892
    zcarpenter92

    zcarpenter92 Yotas and Yellow Jackets

    Joined:
    Feb 16, 2015
    Member:
    #973
    Messages:
    5,252
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Zach
    NE Colorado
    Vehicle:
    2008 Desert Sand 5.7L DC
    In sig
    Crashing after falling asleep at the wheel is the scariest fucking thing I've ever experienced. I was working crazy hours when I worked on a potato farm last year, long story short of it is I drove 7 miles asleep and then went into an irrigation ditch by the road. Woke up right as I was going into the ditch, missed a telephone pole by a foot. The Duramax was totaled but I got out of it without anything but scratches.
     
    Law323[QUOTED] likes this.
  23. Jul 18, 2016 at 8:46 PM
    #3893
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    Sorry? I remember seeing the stupid card game when I was in high school but that was over 15 years ago. My kids watch reruns on tv too but why that shit would be in a rental car last year is beyond me
     
  24. Jul 18, 2016 at 10:17 PM
    #3894
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
    I agree with u..

    See what I am referring to here
     
  25. Jul 19, 2016 at 5:39 AM
    #3895
    Law323

    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2016
    Member:
    #3081
    Messages:
    9,812
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    It really is! It's like you're not sure if it's a dream or real, but it freaks you out!!
     
    zcarpenter92[QUOTED] likes this.
  26. Jul 19, 2016 at 6:39 AM
    #3896
    jberry813

    jberry813 The Mad Scientist Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2014
    Member:
    #68
    Messages:
    1,917
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Lake Tahoe
    Vehicle:
    2015 Tundra Platinum, 2012 Tacoma, 2007 T4R
    Metric shit ton of parts
    What the fuck

    image.jpg
     
  27. Jul 19, 2016 at 7:25 AM
    #3897
    Law323

    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2016
    Member:
    #3081
    Messages:
    9,812
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    ORRRR you could search for the green fairy at the bottom of a bottle of absinthe!!
     
    Yotalover88 and zcarpenter92 like this.
  28. Jul 19, 2016 at 4:39 PM
    #3898
    1G3-TRD

    1G3-TRD New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2014
    Member:
    #486
    Messages:
    508
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Aaron
    Vehicle:
    2014 double cab TRD off road
    Between a rock and a hard placea7e6c696274520fe4e8038b3c19730c9_feaf29ff517897a4de304e2a65fef04437b916b6.jpg
     
  29. Jul 22, 2016 at 3:25 PM
    #3899
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 5, 2014
    Member:
    #6
    Messages:
    163,500
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Elon
    Not my photo, but fortunately, the driver lived.

     
    Bob[OP] likes this.
  30. Jul 22, 2016 at 3:39 PM
    #3900
    2cID

    2cID New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 22, 2016
    Member:
    #3671
    Messages:
    183
    Gender:
    Male
    Vehicle:
    16 crewmax 4x4
    Car seat covers
    But did he make his delivery....fridge still isn't here....
     

Products Discussed in

To Top