Tundras live: Dumb Dad Jokes, Incorrect Opinions, and Relationship Advice.

3MM, what a rookie?
Just kidding, I've passed 4 and 5s, and it ain't no fun.
I hope that it is the end of them for him.

Rolling on the floor in pain with nothing to stop it.
I've got 6 and 7s in my kidneys right now, as long as they don't move, I'm golden.

I know you already drink lots of water.
I think I got most of mine in the 1990s from holding urine.
I was so busy delivering packages I didn't have time to take a piss...

I'm my younger days they looked like this.


The last few a couple of years ago looked like this.


Good times..

 

Did some organizing today and added some patches to my patch wall...

 

And holy hell those stones look terrible!

 

Great now Amazon is going to be trying to sell me maxi-pads for the next few months

 

I struggle to understand why people dig those things out of the toilet after passing them....

 

ddd

The second picture looks like milk duds?

 

As you should.

 

5am-ish

at my desk

bringing all my daily work up on the desktop.

catching up on a few pages Tundras.

whilst sipping black coffee. (Community coffee breakfast blend)


always a good laugh.


Life is good.

 

waking up again, late this time... Kid was not a happy sleeper last night. His saving grace is that smile he gives every time he wakes up. heart warming...

Cheers to you, with coffee.

 

Morning all, cheers!
Coffee and Tundras.com


Maybe a little work here and there.

 

I couldn't watch the full moon rise due to the storm cycle that hid it from view on Monday evening. Lucky for me, today on a -10 morning, I was able to watch it set.

 

Here and there.

 

so...in my quest to get rid of the herons at the lake house*:

I got one of those commercial size bird repeller speaker things.

it makes the sounds of predatory birds and birds in distress. <you can pick your bird sounds>


well...it appears to not only work, but now we have 3 new cats walking around.
<the otter was a bonus.>


ain't nature amazing!





*the heron decoy thing worked the best.

 

Is heron shit on your dock the thing you're wanting to rid yourself of?

 

yes..

giant blobs of shit.

 

How to Deter Herons | Heron Decoy | The Pond Guy

^Deterrence seems like a lot of work. Do you happen to have a suppressed .22lr? Because I have an idea...

 

man, look here.

I'm already sideways with the HOA.


the heron decoy appears to have worked.






and yes...Volquartsen.

 

I'll relive this with y'all.

what does NOT work on Herons:
owls
bobble head owls
spinny flashy thing on dock
electric perimeter monitoring light-flashy, noise making thing

what works:

Heron decoy.




I am presently taking suggestions on the Otter.

 

Some interesting facts for your Wednesday morning:
A flock of herons is called a seige
A flock of crows is called a murder
A flock of Karens is called an HOA

 

I would love to pass that after what I went through around this time last year. Cliff notes:
Started having weird lower back pains, it came and went, I kind of figured it was a stone. I had an 1/4" one 11 years prior and it passed no problem.
A couple days later I find myself on the floor in my living room, don't really remember falling. Apparently I blacked out from the pain. That was enough. Off to the ER I go.
I get to the ER and I'm in really bad shape, they give me some good pain meds and a CT scan.
Doctor comes out and says I have five, (yes 5) 5/8" - 3/4" kidney stones and my right kidney has started to go into failure because they were blocking the flow. Great. No one on earth can pass a stone that big let alone 5.
Surgery is scheduled and I learn this will all happen in 3 phases.
Surgery # 1, scheduled for 2.5 weeks after my initial lower back pain. (So I'm living with this nightmare pain for that long and they won't prescribe me anything more than ibuprofen 800. They tell me if I need anything more I need to go to the ER). I have surgery and everything goes great. They ram a scope up my peehole go past my prostate through my bladder, and into my right kidney. The scope has a laser in it and they basically blast all the stones into sand and very small fragments. They install a stent in between my right kidney and bladder to help hold open my ureter so everything can pass. When I wake up I can tell there is something inside me. It doesn't hurt but it feels weird. I will have this stent for the next month. It literally makes you have to pee almost immediately after drinking anything. Shit just flows straight through.

I'm sent home and warned about this but nothing and I mean nothing prepares you for peeing blood and sand for weeks on end. And the pain. At least it isn't kidney failure pain, but wow it burns for a couple weeks.

Surgery # 2, scheduled for 1 month after the first one. Same procedure but on the left kidney, except they remove the stent from my right kidney and then put one in on the left. Thankfully I'm asleep for these surgeries. I wake up and same thing as last time. I get to keep the stent for a month and pee blood and sand, blah blah blah blah.

So now it's like 2 months since this all started and I am free from stones. I have adjusted my diet accordingly and upped my water intake to prevent this in the future.
Now it's time for the final procedure.
Stent removal.
Oh? What's this?
This happens while I'm awake?
FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUU!!!!!
I'm not ok with this, but I want this damn thing out. It's super uncomfortable.
I go in for my procedure and right off the bat the nurse says, you need to get naked. No socks, no shirt. 100% naked.
OK.
I undress and then she has me lay on this table.
Did I mention it's like 60 degrees in the room?
I lay down and she folds these things out. Oh, I must be getting my pap smear. WTF.
So there I am laying on the table with my legs up in stirrups, spread eagle, completely naked.
I then get to lay there for what seemed like hours, super uncomfortable and cold.
The doctor comes in and then wants to have a discussion with me about the procedure and what I'm going to feel etc.
Great.
I'm still sitting here butt naked.
So now he straps my legs into the stirrups and keeps reminding me to stay relaxed.
Then he pulls out this scope thing that has a grabber at the end of it.
And
It goes straight into my peehole.
Good times, that burns and hurts like hell. But he was right it only hurts for a a little bit and then that pain turns into massive pressure. Likely from getting said peehole stretched out.
He's talking to me the whole time, Ok, we're now about to pass the prostate. Relax please.
Relax.
CHRIS, the scope is stuck near your prostate because you are too tense and your prostate is grabbing the scope. I can't move it until you relax.
So I relax and it literally feels like someone pinching you inside really hard with a red hot poker. That is crazy painful.
We get passed the prostate and now enter the kidney. He sees the end of the stent and deploys the grabber, then warns me. This is the most unpleasant part but it's over in 10 seconds.
And with that, I live the longest 10 seconds of my life where he pulls the stent out. I can feel every inch of it leaving my body. It literally feels like I'm being pull started like a lawnmower. And the whole time I'm thinking, I wonder why it feels like its so long.
Well.
Because it is. My assumption was it was like 4 or 5 inches long. This thing was 14 inches long.
The stent now is out. The doctor and nurse leave no room for small talk and literally look at me, ask if I'm good and then say have a nice day and leave. I clean up, get dressed and walk out of that place. I feel absolutely embarrassed and almost ashamed. Basically violated. LOL. I never want to deal with that shame again. LOL.

I have a picture of the stent, but won't post it unless people really are curoius.

 

Holy shit. Negative on the stent pics. Just no.
I cannot UNREAD that. I should not have read that.
I need brain bleach.

Glad you're stone free.

Note to self: Keep the water intake up.

 

Great PSA. I'm good for kidney health, but if I ever need this procedure, I'm paying for the anesthesiologist when that last stent comes out.