Tundras live: Dumb Dad Jokes, Incorrect Opinions, and Relationship Advice.

1: that's cool that you let you wife have a BF.
I've been telling mine to go get one for years, so she'll leave me alone and let me get some shit done around here.
2: you think she'll come home with $8k? Or $2k?

 

You're ok with your wife spending the night in a casino with her boyfriend?

 

On a different note...Friday night we lost power for 7hrs. Last night it was only for 2.5 hours so we're making progress.

 

Why you gotta ruin the game?

 

Best friend silly.
Sorry, I'm not hip with the kid's lingo..

 

It was a best friend, I don't the letters for that.
Maybe BFF? BBD? SWF? BBW?

If she did have a boyfriend, that would make my life easier.
Maybe he can come over and mow the yard or something.
He could also help pay for the washer/dryer.

It was $8600, I only want 1/2 of the washer and dryer costs, we split big purchases..

 

All of mine and her money gets direct deposited into one bank account.
She pays all the bills and when I want to buy something, I submit a purchase request.
"Hey, I need to buy xyz, can I do it this week, or wait until next pay period?"
"Hey, I need gas, which card should I use?"
Etc.
I have no idea how much money is in the bank, what we owe, how much money I make,.....
It's better this way.

 

@Tripleconpanna I'm gonna need you to decipher all this alphabet stuff these two have going on.

 

I know what I make
I don’t know where it goes (but likely I’m the one spending most of it)

 

It's different for every couple. Lots of ways to do it, but you have to find what works for your marriage.

 

We have separate bank accounts, no kids at home, just her and I and the dog.
She gives me a fixed amount every month and I pay all the bills.
Bills get paid, money gets saved, she buys whatever, I buy whatever.
I probably don't want to know how much her Tory Burch purses and shoes cost.

Although I have no idea how much money she has..

 

I should probably do an audit at some point and find out what kinda shady shit she's up to.

 

At least 8k right?

 

We do the yours, mine, and ours thing. About half of each of our paychecks go to the joint, and each of us keep the other half in individual accounts. We split most of the bills between our individual accounts and keep almost all of the joint for investments. We're not getting any kind of pensions, only social security when we retire, so saving/investing is a high priority for both of us, especially as we're getting closer to 60 now. But we're DINKs, the house and cars are paid off, and other than guns, bourbon, and cigars I don't have any expensive hobbies. Except hunting and truck stuff. And spoling the grandkids. She buys clothes, but not like a diva; and that's about the extent of her extravagance. She has way more money than me...

 

My wife and I have had a joint account for 20+ years. She does all the bills. I gave her two mandates. No late fees and always maintain a buffer in the checking account. Over the years the buffer size has fluctuated but she has never missed a bill.

Both of us are frugal, so it's any easy trust relationship.

 

Sounds like you guys have figured out what works for you.

I like the slight split but shared type of ideas as well. Single for the foreseeable future so it may not matter, but finances would definitely be something discussed before anything gets serious. My personal preference is a all income goes into the main pool, all needs (tithe, bills, food, insurance, etc.) come out of the main pool. Remaining funds split in half, with one half going to savings for emergencies and such and the other half is split again between spouses to be used as they see fit. If a want or major expense will be outside what that allowance can cover, it needs to be a joint decision. Then there is no "you spent all our money" or "you never let me do anything for me" BS to deal with.

 

The turning point early in our marriage was when my truck was repossessed.
Not because I was broke,......I was just so busy that I literally forgot to make a payment for over 2 months. And I'm terrible at checking/opening mail.
Once I got the truck back, she told me to just sit there and look pretty, she'll handle getting bills paid.

 

Probably a smart move for both of you. I have a buddy who is terrible with money. He'd spend it all and then some, but his wife is a whiz with figures. He gives it all to her and just asks if he can buy stuff or do things. If it's not possible he's totally fine, and she will also work the budget to get stuff he's asked about previously. They've been happily married for longer than I've been alive and have never had a fight about money.

 

The weird thing is that I'm a wiz with projects at work and have no issue with budget and organizing, etc.
I just suck at keeping track of my own shit.
I'm sure it's just some kind of psychological crap. She does the stuff she's good at and I do the stuff I'm good at. Makes it less stressful for everyone. I don't have to worry about paperwork at home and she doesn't have to worry about any of the "guy" stuff.
But, if one of us croaks early, the other is screwed. She's having trouble adjusting to the idea that we're 50 now. 60 isn't far away and I don't see making it past 70. Need to get our ass in gear, get the new house done, get out of debt (for the second time), build some savings, get (her) set up for the future, etc.

 

My 20-year term life insurance expires in 4 years, I've been paying it.
I think if she wants me to have life insurance after that, she should pay for it.
I mean she is the one that benefits from it, right..

 

If you think you'll kick off before her, it's pretty easy to set her up. Let her know you want life insurance that will provide a solid income for her golden years, and that's the finances. Then, for the "guy" stuff, make sure the new house has a pool. She can get the pool boy to do whatever she needs.

 

Our accounts are easy, my wife stays home with the kids, I bring home the bacon
One checking, one small savings and one large savings plus all my other investment accounts.

Oh, and all our cash buried out back.

 

A Roth IRA would be a easy way to get started. It's post tax, up to $6,500/yr I believe. No penalties to withdrawal after 59.5 y/o I think.
YouTube that shit to learn more. Sign up with Vanguard or TD Ameritrade

 

Sounds like our house…except my wife does have some random income with the farms (grant dependent)