What makes you angry?

If you got one of those locking lug things make sure you get the key back. My dealer was the only one who rotated my truck and when I went to Costco to get new tires, it was no where in the truck. Had to get a local lube shop to hammer them off, dealer gave me standard lugs as replacement but never said they had it, lucky I'm in a small town and the guy knows me, I didn't have to get redneck with him.

 

Bluebirds.
I thought it bloody hilarious yesterday when a pair of Bluebirds took umbrage at their reflection in my mirrors, those little turds were attacking my mirrors for about 30 minutes.
Not so funny when I came to leave the farm and my mirrors were covered in bird spit/ foot marks, that and my doors paintwork are covered in shit.

 

I’ve caught that a couple of times when tires were supposed to be rotated. I always mark one of the wheels beforehand just in case. One time they’d rotated them and drawn a smiley face next to my x.

 

I've been told if you sail a tall masted ship, wear a pointy hat and say things like "arrr" and "me hearty", there's a bay you can visit.

 

I'm never "allowed" to go out and get any work done in the yard or garage because then my wife would have to put her phone down and actually watch the kids.

 

This shit didn't go on before they came out with all this "child abuse" and "domestic violence" horseshit.

 

That's expensive and time consuming.

 

Depends where she lands on the hot-crazy matrix.

Is she also really, really rich?

 

Then we're back to relying on the hot-crazy matrix.

 

Here's a couple ideas to maybe get you banned from watching the kids...

 

You got him there.

 

If he's putting up with that kind of nonsense, she probably is smokin hot.


Or twice his size.

 

What if the current one is really, really hot?

 

No, I don't think I will.

 

Then he'd have to share her

 

we'll need to confirm; it's for... well science

 

My older sister would attest to me being like uncle Mike here.

 

The Woman has a fucking cell phone. She rarely answers her fucking cell phone. She's out grocery shopping, I need her to pick up something extra. She's not answering her fucking cell phone. This happens all. the. fucking. time.

She's puts the damn thing on silent or lets it run out of battery or just plain old ignores it.

This time it's garlic. What if next time the house is on fire, or little AK is being rushed to the hospital, or a loved one has died suddenly, or there's some other emergency where she needs to be contacted immediately.

I'm the first guy to say fuck being connected all the time. However if I'm in cell reception my phone is charged, on, accessible and I can hear the ringer. It takes me 2 seconds to hear my phone, glance at the display and decide to answer it or send it to voicemail. If I see The Woman's name on the call display, I answer it no matter what. It's part of being a responsible spouse and parent.

So today we're having a teaching moment. I'm calling her repeatedly until she either answers or gets home. If she gets home without answering, dinner is delayed by 30 minutes because I'll have to go back out to the store to get garlic.