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Tundras live: Dumb Dad Jokes, Incorrect Opinions, and Relationship Advice.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by Bob, Jan 4, 2014.

  1. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:26 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且

    I feed the aforementioned retarded tortoise and he came out to eat a little bit ago. So here you can see him, his water dish that I found the physicadellic toad in, and the cover of the BBQ grill that he lives under.


    20230722_172051.jpg
     
  2. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:30 PM
    RichterScale

    RichterScale I identify as a potato

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    Does he at least have a job?
    Eat a bug once in awhile? Answer a phone? Anything?
     
  3. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:34 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且

    No. like I said he's retarded. I should submit paperwork to get him SSI.
     
  4. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:36 PM
    FrenchToasty

    FrenchToasty The Desert rat, SSEM #5/25, 6 lug enthusiast

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    The SoAz….. big surprise
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    Is he eating cat food? No wonder he’s so small. My moms turtle Steve is 30 years old or so and is bigger than a kickball from gym class
     
  5. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:39 PM
    RichterScale

    RichterScale I identify as a potato

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    He identifies as a cat
     
  6. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:41 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且

    No. When he wandered into my garage a couple of years ago I quickly figured out that he was a released pet that wasn't taken care of, and yes, he was addicted to cat food, not normal. Since then the cat gets feed on an elevated platform I made so he can't touch it. He gets feed a combination of fresh greens/veggies and mostly reconstituted desert/grassland commercial tortoise food, which is what he's eating in the pic.
     
  7. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:45 PM
    FrenchToasty

    FrenchToasty The Desert rat, SSEM #5/25, 6 lug enthusiast

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    Ahhh ok, will he not eat regular turtle food like fresh veggies and fruit? Do you spoil him with prickly pear fruit?
    Steve is a mad man and will chase you down for some cantelope or watermelon, the boys love to play with him, as exciting as that can be?
     
  8. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:55 PM
    FrenchToasty

    FrenchToasty The Desert rat, SSEM #5/25, 6 lug enthusiast

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    The SoAz….. big surprise
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    Bone stock
    It’s still 108 outside, I’m going out to pull the cone filter on the 4runner to be washed pre oil change tomorrow, wish me luck!
     
  9. Jul 22, 2023 at 5:55 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且

    He will now and even has some favorites like cucumber. Considering how bad he was when he showed up, we like to give him the prepared stuff that has all the nutrients needed. We usually give him a mix of fresh vegetables and this.

    20230722_175208.jpg
     
  10. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:05 PM
    RichterScale

    RichterScale I identify as a potato

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    I'll bet he sneaks out at night and buys street cat food.
    Are you missing shit in the house? Tools, jewelry, DVDs?
     
  11. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:07 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且


    He is a shifty little shit. I don't trust him.
     
  12. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:14 PM
    SwitchThrottle

    SwitchThrottle Living in Idiocracy

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  13. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:17 PM
    Cpl_Punishment

    Cpl_Punishment Do unto others as they've done to you

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    2WD?

    upload_2022-9-30_22-14-38.jpg
     
  14. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:21 PM
    LarryDangerfield

    LarryDangerfield Yo! Lemme get a honk off of that bobo Staff Member

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    You just wait
    I did not even notice that. Yuck. Lol. Here's a pallet cleanser that made me laugh
     
  15. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:34 PM
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

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  16. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:38 PM
    Leo's first

    Leo's first TRUCK GANG

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    :drool: Five Guys ?
     
  17. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:41 PM
    Blue Thunder

    Blue Thunder Smooth in the Cruise

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    Five Guys for the Win!
     
  18. Jul 22, 2023 at 6:47 PM
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Owner, CTO and executive chairman of X Staff Member

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    Yep. Pretty much my go-to for burgers on a sat evening
     
  19. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:15 PM
    1794TX

    1794TX Should be taken in small doses

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  20. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:17 PM
    1794TX

    1794TX Should be taken in small doses

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    If frogs with hallucinogenic skin are regularly hanging out in the turtle's water bowl, that might account for some abnormal behavior.
     
  21. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:24 PM
    RainMan_PNW

    RainMan_PNW "Oz" SSEM #82 RGBA #4 Unofficial Forum Treasurer Vendor?

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    No wonder he hangs around - you feed him. That’s why we have a peacock and four peahens that hang out at our house
     
  22. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:27 PM
    RainMan_PNW

    RainMan_PNW "Oz" SSEM #82 RGBA #4 Unofficial Forum Treasurer Vendor?

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    This makes me laugh.
    I’m picturing your little coal miners running around with a kick-ball-sized 30-yr-old tortise in the middle like a slow motion game of keep away.
     
  23. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:28 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且

    Many, many years ago I dated a Mexican chick whos mother had peacocks on her property. Those things are loud mean fuckers.









    The peacocks were pretty loud and mean too.
     
  24. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:31 PM
    RainMan_PNW

    RainMan_PNW "Oz" SSEM #82 RGBA #4 Unofficial Forum Treasurer Vendor?

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    I feel like that business name and what they actually sell was such a let down for me… i mean, I enjoyed the tacos, but I feel like there is such a missed opportunity in what they could be…
    :spy:
     
  25. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:32 PM
    GODZILLA

    GODZILLA New Member

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    :laughing:
     
    T-Rex266 and Azblue[QUOTED] like this.
  26. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:33 PM
    RainMan_PNW

    RainMan_PNW "Oz" SSEM #82 RGBA #4 Unofficial Forum Treasurer Vendor?

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    The peacocks are only really loud during mating season - March through early July. Unless they are startled (they make hood watch animals). These ones are more curious than anything - certainly not mean. Any time I am in the yard and making noise (mowing lawn, cleaning brush, today when I vacuumed the ash out of the grill) they all come over real close to check it out and see what’s going on
     
  27. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:37 PM
    Azblue

    Azblue Beer is Good Staff Member

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    The Dirty T ( ^_^)_且


    Yep, just like the Mexican chick I was dating.
     
  28. Jul 22, 2023 at 7:37 PM
    RainMan_PNW

    RainMan_PNW "Oz" SSEM #82 RGBA #4 Unofficial Forum Treasurer Vendor?

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    Right now, the hummingbirds in my yard are the ones being loud and mean. I’m waiting for one to buzz through and impale me while they are fighting with each other.
     
  29. Jul 22, 2023 at 8:15 PM
    NWPirate

    NWPirate Give me overtime or give me death

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  30. Jul 22, 2023 at 8:21 PM
    Cpl_Punishment

    Cpl_Punishment Do unto others as they've done to you

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    Was it ever not mating season for her?
     

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