Guys, what cologne do you wear?

I wash my hands BEFORE I use the bathroom.
Dead serious. Not trying to be funny.
I'm not touching myself to take a leak before washing off all the germs I picked up on the way to the restroom. I might do a bullshit hand rinse if there's someone in there, just because it's a nonsense cultural thing, born of myth and wives tales, so they don't have a panic attack. But if I wash my hands before I take a leak, they're still clean when I leave the bathroom. I don't know wtf is going on with guys' junk that you have to clean your hands after you hold it to pee, but if your hands are dirty after you touch your little prick, there's something wrong with you and your hygiene practices.
Mine is clean as a whistle.
Hold on,.....I'll post pics........

 

This is why some people don’t like to shake hands.

 

People still (without knowing they do it) put their hand to their face/nose after shaking hands, making contact, etc. Same reasons animals do it. It gives you information. Is the person healthy, sick, are they potential competition, potential mate, etc, etc.
How would you glean that info if I washed all the scent off my hands?

 

So, your knob rubs around in your kecks all day, spreading whatever fluids it might have passed onto the material and by association your dick and is sharing a space with a sweaty ballsack and you are fine with spreading all that gunk everywhere else, nice.

Let's just say that of all the first world countries I've visited I've not noticed a regular succession of men leaving without washing in any other country but the US. A statistician isn't going to take my casual observation as a great data collection method and your observations may be completely different. If peoples hygiene routines are that slack in public it figures that they aren't much better anywhere else either.

 

Sounds like you need to see a doctor.
At least wash it a little better when you shower. I dunno.
So far, I haven't dealt with any leaky fluids all over the inside of my pants. And I don't piss myself (yet) or piss all over my hands when I piss.
Like a said, my hands are usually dirty on the way to the rest room. I'm not touching myself after I've been working on something, or shook a few hands, etc.
If yours is all leaky and funky and smelly, then by all means, wash your hands after you touch it. Maybe flop it into the sink and give it a wash too.

 

At least hose it down with some cologne.
It will help the smell and the alcohol should kill some of the germs.

 

You piss, then shake, then put it away. It's not rocket science to understand, you obviously don't wash it in the public sink, you do the math.

 

Maybe tea bag it in the toilet then?
You could always lather it up with hand sanitizer.

 

You can chank all you like but I'm not the one with poor hand hygiene.

 

So it’s still ok to rub a little fromunda cheese behind the ears, wrist and chest area still? Just want to be sure, you know old habits are hard to break

 

Yeah, but get her permission first or she'll pitch one.

 

This all makes me wanna rub my nuts all over your drum set.

 

Things can get pretty acrobatic in the shower with the ole lady in there at the same time, but I’ve never once in 43 years washed my pecker and somehow missed scrubbing the beanbag too.

And please excuse my xenophobia, but given my profession, I’m a little leery of your hygiene advice.

 

Yesterdays cologne.

oak & fire.

 

Yes please.
Toss that in the mail. Thanks.

 

Totally guilty of axe showers

 

She's just keeping you on your toes

 

Somehow this thread has gone from what cologne do you wear to whether you wash your hands or not after touching your junk.

Just keep your hands in your pockets and nod when someone wants to give you a handshake. You never know where their hands have been, period.

Keep some wipes on hand in the event you can’t avoid the handshake in a formal setting. Problem solved.

Either that or douce yourself in Brut and they won’t get close enough to even offer a handshake.

 

Hey I like brut lol

 

Even if you do wash your hands, you still have to grab the fecal encrusted door handle to make your escape. If you do that, have your really accomplished anything by washing?

 

Use your paper towel?

 

You can’t deny that some people douce themselves in that cheap stuff. It’s like their sense of smell is gone.

You could say people do that with a lot of colognes, but I run into that more often with Brut. Most likely because it’s so cheap.

 

LOL old ladies who lose their sense of smell and spray perfume until they can smell it. Its still only one spray you old bag!

 

I use the pinky finger pull on that one myself.

 

Plot twist...only have the hand blow dryer...now what's your move?

 

@MadMaxCanon is right, you use the paper towel that you dried your hands with to open the door. Anyone here who’s been in the military has seen how quickly germs spread living in barracks.

 

I agree with that but unfortunately my work uses the touchless hand driers.

 

Put your hand inside your sleeve.

 

This thread is derailed and needs to die