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Crazy things your parents did to you.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by nvrgvup444, Dec 2, 2019.

  1. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:07 PM
    #1
    nvrgvup444

    nvrgvup444 [OP] New Member

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    I was laughing at the Godzilla horn thread and thought it would be cool if we shared some stories that our parents did that emotionally scarred us.
    ______________________________________________
    I wasn't always the "good" kid. One day as a youngster I was walking down the street and I hear this deep bellowing voice echoing through the neighborhood. "Scott.... Scott... This is God" I looked around in panic and then God said, "Scott... You need to go home NOWWWW...."

    For the life of me I really thought God knew that I was about to get in trouble.

    It was a few years later that my dad let me know that he put a loud speaker in his 1978 Ford truck.

    _____________________________________________

    I had my friends over camping and my father decided it would be funny to dress up like a ghost and wander around the shed making noises. We were so scared that we couldn't move.
     
  2. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:12 PM
    #2
    CourtJester

    CourtJester New Member

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    Mine sent me to I a privet religious school.
     
  3. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:15 PM
    #3
    nvrgvup444

    nvrgvup444 [OP] New Member

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    How'd it work out for you?
     
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  4. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:20 PM
    #4
    CourtJester

    CourtJester New Member

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    I learned a lot.
     
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  5. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:49 PM
    #5
    Mr Badwrench

    Mr Badwrench New Member

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    Was it Catholic school? Frank Zappa has a song about them Catholic girls...
     
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  6. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:57 PM
    #6
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Elon approved Staff Member

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    I got whipped with a beaded belt
     
  7. Dec 2, 2019 at 5:59 PM
    #7
    Tacogrande

    Tacogrande New Member

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    My dad was our boy scout leader a couple years. He used to wear old style shorts. During a scout meeting he was sitting on a ledge with one leg propped up teaching a lesson... WITH HIS BALLS HANGING OUT. We were all scarred for life. On the way home I said hey your balls were hanging out.. he said "I know ". I said you sick bastard what the F!!!
     
  8. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:00 PM
    #8
    runCMD

    runCMD BAMF Nerd

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    My mom had a studded belt she used on us. Also had her name on it and she would threaten to imprint her name on our backside. Also had the classic cliche broken wooden spoon over my head.
     
  9. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:00 PM
    #9
    TXMiamiFan

    TXMiamiFan SSEM #3 and tractor extraordinaire

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    Dad wanted me to learn to swim in the deep end. So he asked me for the key to the locker (where my clothes were) and he throws the key into the middle of the diving pool; 12 feet deep. Says go get it cause you need to change before we go home; you have a few minutes.

    Needless to say I went down to get it and learned I could swim in the deep LOL
     
  10. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:01 PM
    #10
    runCMD

    runCMD BAMF Nerd

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    ...
     
  11. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:03 PM
    #11
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Elon approved Staff Member

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    Pretty sure I still have a scar on my lower abdomen lol
     
  12. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:04 PM
    #12
    runCMD

    runCMD BAMF Nerd

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    yup I learned fast to take it on the backside and pretend it hurt more than it did lol
     
  13. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:06 PM
    #13
    P-Factor

    P-Factor New Member

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    Damn... Where do I begin? Father would be in jail according to today's standards.
     
    Last edited: Dec 2, 2019
  14. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:11 PM
    #14
    KTM Hauler

    KTM Hauler New Member

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    Back when I was around 6 or 7 I was enjoying a nice piece of watermelon when my uncle asked if I was eating the seeds. I replied I don't think so but might swallowed a few on accident. Then he proceeds to tell me that if I did watermelons were going to grow in my stomach and needed to go to the hospital right away. Now that was 40 some years ago and I still remember being genuinely scared but according to my parents I went ballistic and it took them quite a while to convince me he was full of shit. We still laugh about it every once in a while..
     
  15. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:30 PM
    #15
    T-Rex266

    T-Rex266 Elon approved Staff Member

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    Lol, and over exaggerate the pain
     
  16. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:36 PM
    #16
    15whtrd

    15whtrd Mr. Blonde

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    :rofl:
    Similar story. Dad hanging out on the couch talking to someone. I’m on the floor interested in their conversation. Dad has on those old short shorts (mid 80s). I look and see his D&B’s, look up and he has a smirk on his face. For some reason, I looked back at his area and he pulled the leg open on the shorts. Made eye contact again, and he was straight faced:rofl:Daaaaad!

    When I got older I reminded him about it. He straight face told me no I didn’t and then couldn’t help but crack a smile. Good ole dad haha
     
  17. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:38 PM
    #17
    15whtrd

    15whtrd Mr. Blonde

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    You always have to scream bloody murder so they feel they’ve done enough. I used to squirm and put my hands over my backside so they couldn’t get a good shot. It just ended up worse for me. Learn to just let them get one and bawl my eyes out.
     
  18. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:44 PM
    #18
    nowayout

    nowayout New Member

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    Not parents per say but my Aunt had a scratch and sniff sticker on her dash board one day, she said go ahead and smell it, as I did she proceeded to step on the brakes ending with me face planted into the dash board. We laughed so hard
     
  19. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:49 PM
    #19
    Bob_Wiley

    Bob_Wiley I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful...

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    I remember one day my dad took my brothers and I to the mall to do some Christmas shopping. We were screwing around the whole time and could tell he wasn’t happy, but kept on pushing his buttons anyway. Got in the car, he told us he was gonna whip our butts when we got home. Pulled into the driveway, ran inside and put on as many pair of underwear I could find. Didn’t feel a thing but had to yell loud enough to convince him I’d learned my lesson. Didn’t tell him about it until a few years later. We still get a good laugh at that!
     
  20. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:52 PM
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    Patch999

    Patch999 SSEM #17 You are what you do when it counts

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    I was 8 and did not want to go to school so I was making every excuse to my mom until she had enough and got the belt. She told me to bend over the bed and I had an idea. If I slipped off the bed and turned around she wouldn’t hit me.
    My timing was terrible. She started swinging well before I started moving and I took a belt across the face. My eye swole close and she was forced to let me stay home. Couldn’t have me going to school saying my mom gave me a black eye.
     
  21. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:54 PM
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    Bob_Wiley

    Bob_Wiley I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful...

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  22. Dec 2, 2019 at 6:59 PM
    #22
    Outbound

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    Well, as of last week I think they've managed to top whatever nutso stuff they did to me as a kid (which admittedly wasn't too bad).

    I was informed last week that they want to take the family to Disneyland next year. I'm the only one in my family who has never been. The Woman and my sister-in-law are Disney nerds. My nephew will be 2 years old, so my bro will be on deck for that nonesense. Mom and dad will be doing the grandparent thing and both love kids in general anyways, so Disney is right up their alley.

    I'll be the 31 year old male who hates crowds, constant noise and screaming children. Theme park rides don't really blow my skirt up and I also don't play well in lines. This should be interesting...
     
  23. Dec 2, 2019 at 7:06 PM
    #23
    HappyGilmore

    HappyGilmore Ex 1st Gen Member

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    Me and my dad were rough housing in the living room. I kept getting away and he would grab my ankle and pull me back. Finally I got far enough to grab a door knob and he was pulling my foot while standing. My shoe slipped off and he went flying backwards. He landed right on our non-tempered glass coffee table and shattered it. We both sat there wide eyed in disbelief. He patted himself down, no cuts. Then looked at me with a straight face and said "Clean this shit up," and walked out.
     
  24. Dec 2, 2019 at 7:28 PM
    #24
    Trooper2

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    2 yr old is way too young imho, 4-5 yrs way more fun.
     
  25. Dec 2, 2019 at 7:28 PM
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    landphil

    landphil Fish are food, not friends!

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    When I was 14, and starting to get a handle on things mechanical, my dad bought a GMC 3/4 ton with a 6.2L diesel.

    And here I still fix busted pieces of crap to earn my supper.
     
  26. Dec 2, 2019 at 7:37 PM
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    Trooper2

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    Mom thought the Hot Wheels race tracks were good for spanking us, thru clothes no biggie, bare skin would welp.

    Mom also got mad at me in the car once, while driving she reached around to the back seat and broke her hair brush over my head. More funny than hurt, LOL
     
  27. Dec 2, 2019 at 7:48 PM
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    Toyotoholic

    Toyotoholic -4Life-

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    I got home from school one day and my Mom said to me "go get another toothpaste, please". Thinking nothing of it, I shot down under the stairs (not lighted) to where we stocked extra toothpaste. You can see if the hall light is on but usually I just run in and grab it. We also hang winter jackets and stuff in there so it's a little crowded. Well I dash into the dark, and as I push the jackets aside, one doesn't move... I catch a dim but horrific glance at a Franken-Mike-Myers like face that instantly grabs me and shakes me. I shrieked to an octave in the canine rage and ran so fast I broke the front screen door right off the hinges as I ran to the neighbors house screaming all the way. Little did I know it was my Dad who got the incredibly realistic horror-mask from a buddy at work, and decided to play the joke. The only thing good about this was waiting for my brothers to get home and one by one, watch them get permanently scared shitless from "The thing under the stairs". We had to move the toothpaste after that and we were told the "thing" would return if we didn't get good grades. It worked.
     
  28. Dec 2, 2019 at 8:42 PM
    #28
    Tacogrande

    Tacogrande New Member

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    Lol! My dad also used to sit around the house in his beat up raggedy old froot of the looms and whenever I brought a girlfriend over dad would come to the door and say well hi sweetheart and go in for a hug. Dammit dad!! I had to get mom to make him stop being so damn perverted.
     
  29. Dec 2, 2019 at 9:50 PM
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    Tacogrande

    Tacogrande New Member

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    LMAO!!!
     
  30. Dec 3, 2019 at 5:14 AM
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    Notachickmagnet

    Notachickmagnet New Member

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    Craziest thing my parents did was let us have big parties every weekend with tons of alcohol, and loud music. :eek2:
     

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