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PTSD & Mental Health

Discussion in 'Military' started by ColoradoTJ, Apr 28, 2021.

  1. Apr 28, 2021 at 7:39 AM
    #1
    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    ***Please keep political views out. If you have something to say that involves this content, PM me and I will listen to what you have to say.***

    This topic seems to be off limits for many and should be discussed and treated way more than it is.

    Why are we losing so many active duty, veterans, LEO’s to mental health?

    The numbers are staggering and has hit close to home more often than I care to admit. In the Special Forces groups, we are losing a member every three months to suicide. It’s the fourth month into 2021 and I have known two of America’s finest lost to mental health. One was suicide and one was alcoholism. Yesterday I lost my Brother in Law to this horrible mental condition. Thanks in advance for your condolences. I’m over it and looking to help the ones that aren’t lost.

    What can we do? What are people doing to help? Let’s explore what others have done, help lines, etc.

    Help lines:

    https://www.ptsd.va.gov/gethelp/crisis_help.asp

    https://www.militaryonesource.mil/health-wellness/mental-health/mental-health-resources/
     
    FrankieO, Bob, mfranzen89 and 24 others like this.
  2. Apr 28, 2021 at 7:39 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

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  3. Apr 28, 2021 at 7:52 AM
    #3
    ColoradoTJ

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    What have I been doing?

    -I try and set up alerts to call people. I’m horrible about keeping in contact with people. Hours turns into days, days turn into weeks...we can lose touch with the ones we care about rather quickly. Sometimes a phone call makes a difference in someone’s life.

    - Listen. Sometime a “how have you been?” Then just hear them out. Sometimes some self therapy goes a long way.

    - Take trips. Get people out of their homes and go experience life. Sitting at home drinking all the time leads to alcoholism and the downward spiral.

    - Maybe suggest a pet. Animals have a way of bringing great joy in our lives. Yesterday when my wife came out to the garage and informed me about the horrible news about our family member, she just sat down and cried. Amazing enough, three barn cats and one dog surrounded her to offer comfort. It was rather interesting to see. She is Covid positive right now, so she didn’t wanna cry on my shoulder.


    What ideas do you have?
     
  4. Apr 28, 2021 at 7:52 AM
    #4
    shawn474

    shawn474 Lego connoisseur

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    Mental health, the lack of resources, the stigma that’s still prevalent surrounding reaching out for help, the costs associated with resourcing properly are a national epidemic.......the problem is that even when we are successful at breaking down those barriers, sadly there still isn’t enough affordable, competent and effective care.

    Many of the app based platforms (calm, headspace, etc) are a good first step. And hopefully having these individuals surrounding by or having access to people like you who care and can help them navigate the resources available to them
     
  5. Apr 28, 2021 at 8:02 AM
    #5
    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    Why is there this stigma? I agree with you for sure. People see some horrible shit. Why not talk about it and maybe understand the W’s (why, what can I do, etc).
     
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  6. Apr 28, 2021 at 8:20 AM
    #6
    Grumpy Uncle

    Grumpy Uncle Pushing string down the hall SSEM #10

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    I don't post much anymore but, I will throw some nuggets out there that I have experienced.

    Thanks Chris, for putting a little more light on this.

    Find a good Dr./shrink. THEY ARE OUT THERE.
    Make sure it is diagnosed correctly. In my case it was TBI causing issues.. Once diagnosed the treatment was a 180° turn around.
    Stay away from alcohol while on medications
    When the booze is gone, the demons are still there, so stop running, put the bottle down.
    If the magic pill that DoD or the V.A is pushing isn't working let your doctors know. Try something else.
    Talk to someone, hell even a stranger.
    Talk to your brothers or sisters.
    Know yourself, learn what triggers you
    Then learn to accept who you were and who you are now. Things happen, you can't change them, only deal with them.
    This might not help anyone but this is what I learned and has helped me.
    Most important, fucking talk to someone.
     
    Last edited: Apr 28, 2021
  7. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:09 AM
    #7
    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    Great discussion with your experiences. Appreciate your time as always.

    Projects seem to help as well. I have seen more often than not veterans building something whether it be something to off-road, race, cruise...whatever. Guess I would rather see the money spent on something positive vs drugs/alcohol.
     
  8. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:14 AM
    #8
    shawn474

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    I wish I could tell you man: cultural ideals, sign of "weakness", etc......I have learned that many people who discount counseling don't normally have a good reason or one that they can articulate very well. Generally, in my opinion, they haven't been educated to the benefits, been exposed to someone who has benefitted from it, haven't talked to someone who has utilized similar resources, etc. Simply opening up my discussions with "I have been in some form of counseling / treatment for many years of my life" usually gets a surprised look and a window to at least open the discussion. Even if they don't take the offer right then, they typically come back and ask more questions or more curious about it. They know then that we are all dealing with some things, are not alone and there is opportunity to get help.

    Again my personal opinion is the main reasons to not seek help are: Fear, finances and a "fuck that" mentality. Normalizing the fact that reaching out for help isn't weakness, using examples of famous people (athletes, etc) who have been outspoken about struggles and benefits of reaching out to the experts, and one of the biggest factors - you HAVE to have a connection with the person you're talking to. If after one visit you don't mesh with that therapist, there is no shame in recognizing that this won't work. Going through the motions is as damaging as not seeking help in the first place. Engage, be present, be vulnerable and open to new ideas. Find comfort in the uncomfortability of getting to know yourself (and others) better.......and i always let them know what my therapist used to tell me after each visit "Shawn, please remember we are ALL works in progress."
     
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  9. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:15 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    In remembrance this year:

    4AC48D8D-8B64-46AB-AEDF-F8B231CF909E.jpg 52166BB1-8546-48A1-A0E7-5DBEE0F79CC2.jpg 0CCD48CC-AA4A-4B56-8A51-3D25310DB39B.jpg
     
  10. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:18 AM
    #10
    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    Thank you for sharing and great advice.
     
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  11. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:35 AM
    #11
    jewsNbrews

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    I don't know why there is a stigma, but it just seems to be frowned on by so many. If it's an illness or disease people can see they tend to offer sympathy or even empathy. Mental health is no different, but people can't see it. So they don't think it exists. You don't look sick therefore you can't be sick. Every organ can become diseased, the brain is no different. As a community, culture, country, ect, we must change our view on mental health.

    We also need more mental health facilities. I know in the PNW there are far too few places to be seen for mental health issues.

    Also it seems most men are stubborn about seeking help. They think it makes them weak. Or they just don't want to burden others with their problems.
     
  12. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:37 AM
    #12
    blackdemon_tt

    blackdemon_tt Battery Slayer

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    I remember there was an app when I was in San Diego, almost a decade ago where if you felt like you were going down the pit you could launch this app and would put you in contact with an actual nearby combat vet, which could call you and head in your direction for 1 on 1 support... I don't remember the name of it...
    I'm all for counseling and building something....
    I got 2 project cars and my kids to keep me busy, 1 is special needs so I focus my time in helping him grow and hopefully talk....
     
  13. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:40 AM
    #13
    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    “If it's an illness or disease people can see they tend to offer sympathy or even empathy.”

    Great point.

    I feel that talking about “things” tends to help me. When you are strong in mind....
     
  14. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:41 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    Wow. If you remember the app or know someone using it, that would be amazing to link in here.
     
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  15. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:41 AM
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    Sunnier

    Sunnier Pity the warrior that slays all his foes

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    EMDR- Eye Movement Desensitization and Repossessing works to prevent or mitigate long-term debilitating effects of trauma. Still not well understood exactly how it works, but 20+ years of increasing use by trained therapists on those suffering because of exposures in law enforcement, military, domestic violence, etc. prove that is does work. Something to do with bilateral brain stimulation across the corpus culosum causes the brain to re-process experiences that got jumbled up during the initial (typically very stressful, life-threatening) event.

    In more layman terms, during one or more counseling sessions, the EMDR-trained therapist will move an object back and forth across your field of vision while prompting you to talk about your experience (in some cases, audio tones in one ear then the other could be used instead). Somehow this science-supported magic eases the physiological stress associated with past events... and improves all the negative associated stuff: sleep and memory problems; startle response to loud noises; spontaneous rage; diminished libido; etc.

    I did this years before and can speak for it helping. It’s covered now through a lot of insurance providers and is an acknowledged remedy. Doesn’t remove the memories (so won’t alter recollection of facts for future court testimony), but does stop the intrusive thoughts and related problems.

    Here’s an intro search, for anyone curious:https://duckduckgo.com/?q=EMDR+THERAPY&t=iphone&ia=web

    As close to a magic bullet fix as I know about.
     
  16. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:42 AM
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    blackdemon_tt

    blackdemon_tt Battery Slayer

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    Yes, I'm looking for it. It wasn't a VA app it was something separate
     
  17. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:44 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

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    What? Never heard of this kind of treatment. Thanks for sharing. Amazing what one can learn from a bunch of people on a site.

    Thank you :hattip:
     
  18. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:45 AM
    #18
    jewsNbrews

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    Talking definitely helps. I know it does for me.

    But you have to be ready to listen too. Simple thing like how's it going. Listen to the response. The tone of voice. Sometimes we miss the queues that someone needs help because we don't listen to that response to a simple question. Most people are on auto pilot. "How's it going?" And they expect a simple "good" or "not bad" and continue about their day. They say "how's it going" like it's a greating instead of an actual honest question of how are you doing.
     
  19. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:47 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

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    I agree. When talking to my personal friends I might say “what have you been up to lately?” If they give a general response I usually start talking about what I have been up to and it gets the conversation going.
     
  20. Apr 28, 2021 at 9:48 AM
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    jewsNbrews

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    My ex is currently doing this therapy. She feels for once in her life she is actually making progress. I still don't know much about it, but glad it's working for her.
     
  21. Apr 28, 2021 at 10:08 AM
    #21
    rock climber

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    Does the military offer any specific resources for vets?
     
  22. Apr 28, 2021 at 10:12 AM
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    blackdemon_tt

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  23. Apr 28, 2021 at 10:23 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

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  24. Apr 28, 2021 at 10:25 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

    ColoradoTJ [OP] Certified tow LEO Staff Member

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    Some links in the first post or did you have some other specific questions?

    There is help, but more is definitely needed.
     
  25. Apr 28, 2021 at 10:44 AM
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    Sunnier

    Sunnier Pity the warrior that slays all his foes

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    Yes. Talk therapies, EMDR, even cannabis therapies are being utilized for vets and even current enlisted (I was surprised). Good news seems to be that, while we’re waaay behind in curbing suicides, there’s at least a growing understanding that these are critical issues and must be addressed. I do think treatment options vary by region... differences in states, and urban vs. rural.
     
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  26. Apr 28, 2021 at 11:15 AM
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    nhw544

    nhw544 Food fight!

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    I’m not a veteran, but I can talk about this from the firefighter perspective. I’ve been on the job for 17 years and we’re just now finally embracing mental health. Unfortunately my department has had multiple suicides since I’ve been on and it still took us a while to realize we needed help.

    We started a peer support team and have gotten dozens of members trained in that aspect. That has seemed to help us in the area of stigma. Once people saw what our group was doing, I think it made it easier for some folks to open up and seek help.

    We also had an outstanding facility in our area that provided free mental health services to veterans and first responders. The facility was run by an Army combat vet and a firefighters wife. They were awesome at what they did and even provided equine therapy. Unfortunately, they had to shut down because their funding dried up when covid hit.
     
  27. Apr 28, 2021 at 11:23 AM
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    nhw544

    nhw544 Food fight!

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    I recently saw a study that says the average citizen has 2(ish) traumatic events in their entire life. Police officers can see over 800 in their career. Same goes for Fire and EMS. You can’t let this stuff build up or it will take control.


    One last thing...don’t bottle this shit up. I know from experience. I lost 2 friends in the line of duty back to back and it rocked my world. I let it eat at me until my wife finally told me to get help because I was a completely different person. It took me a while to get back to a better place, but you have to talk to someone and get help.

    If you’re not comfortable talking to someone you know, reach out to these guys. They’re doing good work.
    https://www.nextrung.org/
     
  28. Apr 28, 2021 at 11:42 AM
    #28
    Randy Morton

    Randy Morton Life takes its toll, please have exact change.

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    Even if you have no need for VA care, sign up. It'll help your fellow veterans. The VA uses the number signed up as part of their budget negotiations.

    https://va-form-10-10ez.com/?keywor...piXX-gFVXRn9_Bt1qIJ5MZDjwsqFjgABoCii4QAvD_BwE

    One of the problems is that in the past, veterans were considered weak if they showed signs of PTSD. When they came home from horrendous experiences, the common treatment was to tell them "You didn't get killed, get over it." This was said by people that slept safely in their own beds every night. My Grandfather was a Marine in WW2. He was in combat at Guadalcanal (the best we can determine) and was shot in the hip with a wooden bullet. He survived (he was 63 when the bamboo from the bullet finally killed him) and was sent to El Paso for rehab. My Mother remembers him waking up in the middle of the night when one of the captured Japanese planes flew over. He could tell the difference in the engine sound. He'd run out of the house in his underwear screaming at the plane. When he calmed down, he'd come in, have a drink and a cigarette, and go back to bed. No counseling was available, he was told to "Get over it." He, like many of his peers, self medicated with alcohol. He became an alcoholic and it cost him his family. Many today are repeating that cycle. They come home, receive no help (and the fear of scorn if they ask for help), try to work it out themselves, and often turn to drugs and alcohol to dull the pain. If you see a veteran (or anyone, actually) and they seem to be struggling, offer to help. Sometimes, you only need to be there. Often, you'll hear "You don't understand, you weren't there." Simply say "You're right, but I'm here now. What do you need?"
     
  29. Apr 28, 2021 at 7:10 PM
    #29
    T-Rex266

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    Non veteran but many of my employees are. Many, many of close friends are LE. Some, who have called me in the middle of the night for an ear. A close friend of mine was the one who was running code on the opposite side of the freeway, trying to get this fuck to stop by flashing his spots at him, repeatedly. He then witnessed the crash. Disorderly fucked up and didn’t get the right side of the highway shut down. One of the kids was a fellow LE son.
    https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.denverpost.com/2016/11/30/thanksgiving-wrong-way-fatal-crash-vehicular-homicide/amp/

    Other times when a kid was killed in a stand off as this friend had to listen to his commander and not make entry before this shit head father killed his 14yo

    this past year? Combined with Covid and these bs riots - it’s gotten worse. I just offer an ear- no matter the time, and some suggestions. Always remind them seeking help doesn’t stop u from promotions, nor does it make u a pussy. Ur at least trying to help yourself.

    For my employees: My salaried employees are put through as my company is veteran owned, and as I said earlier- we hire a lot of vets. We have EAP for these (and all) guys and gals. It also helps, our training instructor is a veteran, and x-cop of many years.

    I guess to sum it up: being a trusted friend, manager, and offering suggestions (if needed) help me, help them.
     
  30. Apr 29, 2021 at 10:56 AM
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    ColoradoTJ

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    Vehicle:
    LML 3500HD
    Calibrated Power 5 Tune pack, Allison 1000 tune, PPE deep trans pan, Cold/Hot CAC pipes, Banks CAI, PCV reroute, resonator delete, S&B 62 gal fuel tank, B&W GN hitch
    I can’t imagine what these officers have been going through these past couple of years.
     

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