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I might be a Jerk...

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Discussion' started by landphil, Dec 30, 2018.

Page 1 of 2
  1. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:22 PM
    #1
    landphil

    #1
    landphil [OP] Fish are food, not friends!

    Joined:
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    Member:
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    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Phil
    BC, Canada
    Vehicle:
    ‘08 TRD doublecab
    I bought my wife a “get better soon” card. She’s not sick or anything. :spy:
     
    landphil, Dec 30, 2018
    #1
    stewtopia, jewsNbrews, Sas and 21 others like this.
  2. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:29 PM
    #2
    Vizsla

    #2
    Vizsla ☠️☠️☠️

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2016
    Member:
    #3867
    Messages:
    2,584
     
    Vizsla, Dec 30, 2018
    #2
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, BuckWallace and 6 others like this.
  3. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:30 PM
    #3
    landphil

    #3
    landphil [OP] Fish are food, not friends!

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2016
    Member:
    #4814
    Messages:
    4,346
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Phil
    BC, Canada
    Vehicle:
    ‘08 TRD doublecab
    No, not a jerk? :rofl:
     
    landphil, Dec 30, 2018
    #3
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Notachickmagnet and 3 others like this.
  4. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:31 PM
    #4
    Vizsla

    #4
    Vizsla ☠️☠️☠️

    Joined:
    Jul 14, 2016
    Member:
    #3867
    Messages:
    2,584
    No, maybe bad idea...:D
     
    Vizsla, Dec 30, 2018
    #4
    jewsNbrews, BuckWallace, 1UPPER and 6 others like this.
  5. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:31 PM
    #5
    DJFaninTN

    #5
    DJFaninTN New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 17, 2018
    Member:
    #17133
    Messages:
    625
    Gender:
    Male
    Panama City Beach, FL
    Vehicle:
    2018 Super White 1794
    did she ask you if she looked fat in a certain dress?
     
    DJFaninTN, Dec 30, 2018
    #5
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Notachickmagnet and 1 other person like this.
  6. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:32 PM
    #6
    Grumpy Uncle

    #6
    Grumpy Uncle Pushing string down the hall SSEM #10

    Joined:
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    Member:
    #8801
    Messages:
    12,888
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Pat
    CO
    Vehicle:
    2016 Black CM Tundra TRD Off Road
    4:88s and Auburn LSD, dealership faux Pro, 35" BFGs on XD wheels, OME Lift with Dakars
    Are you sleeping on the couch? Its the thought that counts.
     
    Grumpy Uncle, Dec 30, 2018
    #6
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Law323 and 5 others like this.
  7. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:33 PM
    #7
    War Machine

    #7
    War Machine SSEM # 5 3MW

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2017
    Member:
    #8939
    Messages:
    16,940
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Texas
    War Machine approves.


    936CD89D-F0A8-44B1-A618-9B5FF6E2F3DF.jpg
     
    War Machine, Dec 30, 2018
    #7
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Law323 and 5 others like this.
  8. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:35 PM
    #8
    csuviper

    #8
    csuviper Moderator Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 6, 2014
    Member:
    #38
    Messages:
    17,283
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Brian
    Broomfield, CO
    Vehicle:
    2019 TRD Sport CM 5.7L 4X4
    Some Mods :) See build thread for details
    Ha
     
    csuviper, Dec 30, 2018
    #8
    Notachickmagnet, Rica25 and landphil[OP] like this.
  9. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:37 PM
    #9
    TokerJoker

    #9
    TokerJoker ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2018
    Member:
    #19328
    Messages:
    2,223
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Travis
    Nowhere, Specific
    Vehicle:
    2014 Black SR5 4.6 Dbl Cab
    None.....yet
    Always good to be proactive!
     
    TokerJoker, Dec 30, 2018
    #9
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Notachickmagnet and 2 others like this.
  10. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:40 PM
    #10
    landphil

    #10
    landphil [OP] Fish are food, not friends!

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2016
    Member:
    #4814
    Messages:
    4,346
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Phil
    BC, Canada
    Vehicle:
    ‘08 TRD doublecab
    I thought about getting her a Christmas present, but that didn’t count. So what gives?
     
    landphil, Dec 30, 2018
    #10
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Notachickmagnet and 1 other person like this.
  11. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:45 PM
    #11
    Grumpy Uncle

    #11
    Grumpy Uncle Pushing string down the hall SSEM #10

    Joined:
    Jul 29, 2017
    Member:
    #8801
    Messages:
    12,888
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Pat
    CO
    Vehicle:
    2016 Black CM Tundra TRD Off Road
    4:88s and Auburn LSD, dealership faux Pro, 35" BFGs on XD wheels, OME Lift with Dakars
    Damned if you do and damned if you dont!
     
    Grumpy Uncle, Dec 30, 2018
    #11
    jewsNbrews, Notachickmagnet, Prostar 190 and 2 others like this.
  12. Dec 30, 2018 at 8:59 PM
    #12
    Pat

    #12
    Pat Sorta-new Member

    Joined:
    Jul 19, 2018
    Member:
    #17191
    Messages:
    145
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Pat
    Virginia Beach
    Vehicle:
    '16 MGM SR5 DC
    CAI, 5100's
    Well, there are WORSE things you could have gotten her.
     
    Pat, Dec 30, 2018
    #12
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Law323 and 3 others like this.
  13. Dec 31, 2018 at 1:39 AM
    #13
    CMB

    #13
    CMB New Member

    Joined:
    May 30, 2015
    Member:
    #1352
    Messages:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Male
    Cecil County MD.
    Vehicle:
    2010 Tundra DC 4X4 SR5
    Not nearly enough room here!
    Be expecting your, "Sorry For Your Loss" card pretty soon! :D
     
    CMB, Dec 31, 2018
    #13
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, landphil[QUOTED][OP] and 5 others like this.
  14. Dec 31, 2018 at 2:09 AM
    #14
    Larmand

    #14
    Larmand SSEM #6

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2017
    Member:
    #11835
    Messages:
    4,160
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Lucas
    Fort Worth, TX
    Vehicle:
    2018 SLIGHTLY MODIFIED SR5 TRD CM 4x4-CEMENT
    Its better than a "CONGRATULATIONS on your new baby" card
     
    Larmand, Dec 31, 2018
    #14
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, landphil[OP] and 6 others like this.
  15. Dec 31, 2018 at 5:11 AM
    #15
    Outbound

    #15
    Outbound SSEM #2.5, Token AmeriCanadian

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2016
    Member:
    #4064
    Messages:
    12,345
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Aaron
    Northern Alberta
    Vehicle:
    2022 CrewMax TRD Off Road, MGM of course.
    The Woman was trying on clothes the other day. She didnt like any of them and kept complaining that she had gained a few pounds, had some grey hairs and the odd wrinkle was showing up. She asked me to tell her something nice to cheer her up.

    "You eyesight is damn near perfect" I said.


    That's when the fight started...
     
    Outbound, Dec 31, 2018
    #15
    papasmurf, Part_time, TokerJoker and 14 others like this.
  16. Dec 31, 2018 at 5:40 AM
    #16
    Notachickmagnet

    #16
    Notachickmagnet New Member

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    You all are rotten :rofl:
     
    Notachickmagnet, Dec 31, 2018
    #16
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Trooper2 and 7 others like this.
  17. Dec 31, 2018 at 5:54 AM
    #17
    War Machine

    #17
    War Machine SSEM # 5 3MW

    Joined:
    Aug 7, 2017
    Member:
    #8939
    Messages:
    16,940
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Texas
    A man comes home and sees his wife standing naked by the door.

    "What are you doing?" he asked.

    "This is my love dress," she replied.

    Husband: "Needs ironing!"
     
    War Machine, Dec 31, 2018
    #17
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Trooper2 and 5 others like this.
  18. Dec 31, 2018 at 6:32 AM
    #18
    Law323

    #18
    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
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    #3081
    Messages:
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    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    You got a set on you LOL
     
    Law323, Dec 31, 2018
    #18
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf and Notachickmagnet like this.
  19. Dec 31, 2018 at 6:51 AM
    #19
    1UPPER

    #19
    1UPPER Not A New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2016
    Member:
    #4937
    Messages:
    4,900
    Gender:
    Male
    TEXAS
    Flux capacitor!
    05B82A03-9B9D-4185-A09C-D92469C29E42.jpg
     
    1UPPER, Dec 31, 2018
    #19
    Sas, jewsNbrews, Black Wolf and 7 others like this.
  20. Dec 31, 2018 at 6:57 AM
    #20
    Sunnier

    #20
    Sunnier Pity the warrior that slays all his foes

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2017
    Member:
    #9171
    Messages:
    12,275
    First Name:
    Sunny
    San Diego, CA
    Vehicle:
    2017 Inferno Tundra DC TRD & Longtravel 1st Gen, Banner/ HulkSmash build
    Alright, @Alfalfa, it's time to edit the title of this thread to The He-Man Women Haters' Club.
     
    Sunnier, Dec 31, 2018
    #20
    jewsNbrews, Black Wolf, Notachickmagnet and 3 others like this.
  21. Dec 31, 2018 at 6:59 AM
    #21
    War Machine

    #21
    War Machine SSEM # 5 3MW

    Joined:
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    #8939
    Messages:
    16,940
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Jason
    Texas
    Hey, it happens to all of us.

    A while back my wife said “Let’s run upstairs and make love.”

    I told her “I can’t do both”.
     
    War Machine, Dec 31, 2018
    #21
    TokerJoker, jewsNbrews, Black Wolf and 6 others like this.
  22. Dec 31, 2018 at 7:00 AM
    #22
    Outbound

    #22
    Outbound SSEM #2.5, Token AmeriCanadian

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2016
    Member:
    #4064
    Messages:
    12,345
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Aaron
    Northern Alberta
    Vehicle:
    2022 CrewMax TRD Off Road, MGM of course.
    Yep. Last time The Woman was feeling frisky I asked if she wanted a quickie or the full 2 minutes.
     
    Outbound, Dec 31, 2018
    #22
    Part_time, jewsNbrews, Black Wolf and 8 others like this.
  23. Dec 31, 2018 at 7:03 AM
    #23
    Sunnier

    #23
    Sunnier Pity the warrior that slays all his foes

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2017
    Member:
    #9171
    Messages:
    12,275
    First Name:
    Sunny
    San Diego, CA
    Vehicle:
    2017 Inferno Tundra DC TRD & Longtravel 1st Gen, Banner/ HulkSmash build
    :rofl:
     
    Sunnier, Dec 31, 2018
    #23
    jewsNbrews and Notachickmagnet like this.
  24. Dec 31, 2018 at 7:15 AM
    #24
    FoghornTX

    #24
    FoghornTX Proud American and Infidel since 1968

    Joined:
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    #17569
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    Male
    Ft Worth, Texas
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    2022 Camry XSE (Black w/blackout package)
    Reuters (British Columbia) - A man only identified only as Phil has been found murdered by his wife. Authorities are unclear about motive but they said that the victim had been run over multiple times by his own vehicle. Neighbors said that just prior to the murder that they could hear a loud demonic voice coming from the home. The voice stated, "I'm gonna show you get better soon" and "I'm gonna shove this hockey stick up your ass and you'll be the only human popsicle on Earth." Authorities have still not entered the home to question the wife and have advised everyone to "leave that woman alone."
     
    FoghornTX, Dec 31, 2018
    #24
    jewsNbrews, Notachickmagnet, Trooper2 and 1 other person like this.
  25. Dec 31, 2018 at 8:17 AM
    #25
    Outbound

    #25
    Outbound SSEM #2.5, Token AmeriCanadian

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2016
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    #4064
    Messages:
    12,345
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Aaron
    Northern Alberta
    Vehicle:
    2022 CrewMax TRD Off Road, MGM of course.
    A police chief was called to a scene of a stand off. A woman had murdered her husband and the attending officer was waiting at the front door. The chief asked what was going on.

    "She murdered her husband for walking on the wet floor after she cleaned it."

    "Well, why haven't you gone in and arrested her!?"

    "Sir...the floor isn't dry yet."
     
    Outbound, Dec 31, 2018
    #25
    Sunnier, jewsNbrews, Notachickmagnet and 3 others like this.
  26. Dec 31, 2018 at 9:09 AM
    #26
    landphil

    #26
    landphil [OP] Fish are food, not friends!

    Joined:
    Oct 9, 2016
    Member:
    #4814
    Messages:
    4,346
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Phil
    BC, Canada
    Vehicle:
    ‘08 TRD doublecab
    Negative. Don’t want a simple joke turning into that.
     
    landphil, Dec 31, 2018
    #26
    jewsNbrews and Notachickmagnet like this.
  27. Dec 31, 2018 at 10:28 AM
    #27
    CMB

    #27
    CMB New Member

    Joined:
    May 30, 2015
    Member:
    #1352
    Messages:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Male
    Cecil County MD.
    Vehicle:
    2010 Tundra DC 4X4 SR5
    Not nearly enough room here!
    Roger That. "Female" has always been my favorite flavor!:thumbsup:
     
    CMB, Dec 31, 2018
    #27
    jewsNbrews, Notachickmagnet and landphil[QUOTED][OP] like this.
  28. Dec 31, 2018 at 12:15 PM
    #28
    Law323

    #28
    Law323 it’s only weird if you make it weird

    Joined:
    Apr 7, 2016
    Member:
    #3081
    Messages:
    9,842
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Law
    Baton Rouge, La
    Vehicle:
    2012 4.6 L MGM DC
    Toytec BOSS suspension lift @ 3" (front) Toytec BOSS remote resi's (back) 1" Toytec block (rear) 275/70r18 Toyo AT2 Info system mod 3D MAXpider Kagu floor mats LED interior lights 50% ceramic tint front windows 35% ceramic tint windshield brow Bed mounted YETI bottle opener Paracord wrapped oh Sh!t bars 3" stubby antennae TRD sway bar Upcoming: LED backup lights OEM Backup camera Iron Cross Patriot step bars Trifold or roll up tonneau cover
    A man driving down the road with his wife gets pulled over

    Cop “Sir, do you know why I pulled you over?”
    Man “no, is everything okay?”
    Cop “you were speeding, I clocked you at 70 in a 50”
    Man “oh I’m sorry sir, my speedometer must be broken”
    Wife “I told him he was going too fast”
    Man looks at his wife and says “honey, shut up, I’m handling this!”

    Cop says “you also have a broken taillight”
    Man “oh really? I didn’t realize...I’ll go get a bulb today”
    Wife “I told him about that two weeks ago”
    Man looks at his wife again and says “Dammit, would you shut up??”

    Cop says “your inspection sticker is also out of date”
    Man “I’m sorry sir, I’ve been working 15 hour days seven days a week, I haven’t had time”
    Wife “you just started back working after a two week cycle”
    Man “BITCH SHUT UP!!”

    Cop looks at the wife and asks “does he always talk to you like that?”
    Wife “only when he’s been drinking”
     
    Law323, Dec 31, 2018
    #28
    Sunnier, Sas, jewsNbrews and 2 others like this.
  29. Dec 31, 2018 at 12:28 PM
    #29
    Randy Morton

    #29
    Randy Morton Life takes its toll, please have exact change.

    Joined:
    May 15, 2016
    Member:
    #3378
    Messages:
    1,593
    Gender:
    Male
    First Name:
    Randy
    Deepinahearta, Texas
    Vehicle:
    2012 Tundra Double Cab, Beta Variant (I call it my Land Yacht)
    Randy Morton, Dec 31, 2018
    #29
    Law323, Sas, jewsNbrews and 2 others like this.
  30. Dec 31, 2018 at 12:30 PM
    #30
    Notachickmagnet

    #30
    Notachickmagnet New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2017
    Member:
    #10796
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    Female
    Notachickmagnet, Dec 31, 2018
    #30
    jewsNbrews likes this.
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SOYAMI (So yummy) Vegan Jerky (Original, 12 pack), 5.3 ounce. Non-GMO ingredients. With naturally fermented soy sauce with a hint of sweetness. All natural plant-based and protein-packed nutrition.
$89.90
GrillEye GE0003 Pro Plus Grilling & Smoking Thermometer with Hybrid-Wireless Technology & Cloud Monitoring, Red Black
$90.77
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